Mom and M.G. won't stop yapping on and on about
Okra-Coke. They are all excited about it, and all they do with their free time is talk about
Okra-Coke.
I don't know what is so exciting...it doesn't sound too great to me. I mean, "
okra" I get cuz we are in the South. And "coke" I get, because Mom and M.G. suck down
Diet Cokes like it is their life-force. But Okra-Coke combined just sounds gross.
They keep talking about scheduling a
Fairy ride to get there.
"We have to make sure to schedule the Fairy---don't let me forget."
Now folks, I've seen the way Mom packs for trips, and there is NO way that any little Fairy is going to be able to carry all of HER bags, plus all of MY bags, plus M.G.'s bags. Sometimes Mom doesn't make any sense. Fairies, okra, coke...psssh. They get so excited about the dumbest human things.
They need to learn from me, and get excited anytime a ball gets thrown, or anytime they get new bones...that kind of thing.
So mostly while Mom and M.G. have been running around getting all excited about Fairy rides, I've been getting to know my new B.F.F. Tatters a little better. I've decided that I officially like her. I wasn't sure at first, because she was hogging all the attention. But now that she's been around for a while, I'm starting to like her.
We like to rough-house together a lot. She grabs onto my ear with her fangs and just shakes it until it feels like my ear is going to come off my skull. Then I duck low and ram into her like a bulldozer and knock her on her French butt. We are rough-and-tumble kind of girls.
My new friend did something not-so-friendly though last weekend, and I was so mad at her...I didn't talk to her for the rest of the night!
See, this is what happened...
M.G. was out of town, so Mom decided to have ALL of the dogs sleep in bed with her over the weekend (Tatters totally dug that ménage à trois thing, since she is French and all). So Chuck, Tatters, and I climbed into Mom's big squishy bed and settled in for the night. (Mom got this new featherbed to put on top of her mattress, and it makes our bed extra-squishy soft...we loves the new featherbed.) So Mom went to take her nightly shower, and we three pooches settled in and got cozy. I started to doze off pretty fast (sleeping is kind of my thing). Then all of the sudden I felt something warm, and wet, and smelly encroaching on my sleeping area.
I woke up, and found Tatters PEEING on our bed!! Our nice new feathers and softness and everything! Wet! With stinky Tatters' pee!
I was SO mad--I jumped off of the bed and made a nest on the carpet out of one of Mom's dirty t-shirts, and just waited for Mom to get out of the shower so I could tattle on Tatters.
Mom was SUPER peeved when she got out of the shower. She only had a towel on, but she dropped her towel and threw it on the puddle immediately to try and sop up the pee. (Poor Mom...naked, wet, and jiggling over a pile of dog pee is not a good look for her...not a good look at all.)
All the jiggling and scrubbing was to NO avail--my nice new featherbed was RUINED!
"I hate you Tatters!" I barked, then went and cried in the corner for a few minutes until I fell asleep.
"I hate you Tatters!" Mom said, then pulled her sheets and featherbed off of her mattress and went to sleep out on the sofa.
Chuck, who is forever clueless, said,
"Huh, what? There's pee in the bed?" Then laid back down on the mattress and went to sleep like nothing happened. Chuck is so grody.
Luckily, we dogs are great at forgiving. (I think that's why we are man's best friend...we instantly forgive you humans everytime you do anything stupid or mean to us.) So by the next morning everything was right as rain, and Tatters and I were B.F.F.'s again.
I think it will be a long time before Mom invites Tatters over for a slumbering party in our room again. Which is okay by me really, because I'm a diva, and I pretty much take up Jabba The Hut-sized space on the bed anyway. I require lots of room, as you can see.
